Do you remember your first time?

Reading your favorite mystery novel, that is. What did you think I was talking about? Get your mind out of the gutter and join me as I talk about the first time I read a book by one of my favorite authors, Sue Grafton.

Back in the early nineties, I was working at a home for unruly children. There’s probably a better term for this, but at the time that’s what I called it. I worked the third shift and part of my duties included sitting in the back hall at night and making sure that the girls on the unit stayed in their rooms. I occasionally had to walk around and check each room to make sure that they were, in fact, sleeping and not hurting each other. For the most part, they behaved, so it was a fairly easy assignment. We were allowed to read while we sat in the back hall, since there was really nothing else to do. So, one night I grabbed a random book from the shelf in the office before venturing back to my post. The title was, simply enough, “B is for Burglar.” I thought it sounded fairly mild and that it wouldn’t require much thought on my part, so it seemed like a good choice. Little did I know that waiting for me beyond that cover were pages of a story that would inspire me to start writing my own mystery series.

It was around 1993 or ’94 and the book had been published in 1985. The author, was Sue Grafton. One of the reigning queens of mystery (in my opinion). And after reading this book, which was the second book in the series, I immediately went in search of the first book. And from there, I later read every single one up to the very last book Grafton published before she passed away in 2017. I read them in paperback and listened to the audiobooks throughout the years, sometimes several times over. They were comforting, in the way that old television reruns are a comfort. And when I needed inspiration or just motivation to keep going, listening to Kinsey Millhone work her way through a case without the help of the internet, cell phones, or other modern-day accoutrements was refreshing. It reminds me that anything is possible no matter what it may look like on the surface.

In 2006, I actually received some advice in a letter from Ms. Grafton. Unfortunately, it was not what you’d call uplifting. It was early in my writing career and I had stupidly sent her a copy of my first book, In the Wash: The Rona Shively Stories. She had read a few chapters and then decided to let me know that my work was substandard, in her opinion. I had been so hurt by her feedback that for a time, I couldn’t even look at her books for several years after that. In the letter, she made the snap judgement that my first attempt at a hard-boiled private eye novel was something I’d not taken seriously and implied that my motivation was simply to be published quickly and get famous. She decided this without knowing anything about me and I was so absolutely deflated by her comments that I nearly trashed the whole writing thing. But I knew that my motivation had never been anything so lame or pretentious as just wanting to be published or popular, so I decided to press on. She had no idea how many hours I’d spent in the library researching all of the pieces of the plot I’d put together in my head. She had no idea that I’d been discouraged from being a writer when I was still a teenager and that I’d only just picked it back up after nearly fifteen years of not writing. She had no idea that the birth of my first and only child had inspired me to try writing again. Or that reading her books was why I had decided to write a book in the first place. She just assumed that I was another of hundreds of amateur writers who would never put in the kind of time and energy she’d put into her novels. But she was wrong. She was an excellent author, but God rest her soul, she knew nothing about me, my personal struggles, or what kind of writing I was capable of and her criticism became the number one reason why I went on to write books two through ten of The Rona Shively Stories series.

Eventually, I did read the rest of her books, as I indicated above. I read the whole series and was always impressed by how she could weave a story together so vividly and with so much detail. She was an excellent writer and I’m truly sad that she did not get to finish the Kinsey Millhone series. It’s probably one of the greatest injustices a writer can suffer; leaving a great series unfinished. But no one will ever be able to write Kinsey like she wrote Kinsey. And no other author should want to do that. As authors, we should want to write our own characters in the way that we want to write them. And we should write unapologetically, using our experiences and the skills that God has given us to create stories of our own; stories that will speak to readers as no other author’s stories can. Her words may have ripped my heart out at the time (even if that wasn’t her intention), but in that pain I found what I needed to justify writing Rona the way I wanted to write her. She was my character and my characters don’t always know everything they need to know when they need to know it. My characters are on a journey, trying to figure out what it all means and why we bother.

Ultimately, Grafton’s words did motivate me to become a better author and to help others get their stories out there (hopefully without ever making them feel as low as I felt back then). I’ve always felt that there is more than enough room on the stage for all of us. Writers who have just started and writers who have been around a while. And I never saw the logic in making someone feel terrible about their writing if they had the courage to at least try it. Everyone has a story to tell; some may not be as exciting or endearing as others, but they don’t have to be. We can all learn from one another’s experiences and if someone wants to try and share those experiences in a book, what harm does it do to encourage them to do just that? As a publisher now, I always try to look at the stories I receive through the lens of someone who is looking for advice in whatever the subject mater area presented in a manuscript may be. Some are a fit for my company, some aren’t. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t serious about writing. Or that they shouldn’t bother. We can’t all be Sue Graftons or Lisa Scottolines or James Pattersons or Janet Evanoviches (pardon the pluralization on these). It would be ever so boring if we all were. I’d much rather be Rebecca Benston writing Rona Shively and reading all of these other great authors who have given me such inspiration and joy over the years. I think that’s how it’s supposed to be.

Rebecca Benston is the owner of Higher Ground Books & Media and the author of over twenty titles currently available through Amazon and other outlets. Her books include a mystery series (The Rona Shively Stories), empowerment resources such as Wise Up to Rise Up, Don’t Be Stupid (And I Mean That in the Nicest Way), and From Judgment to Jubilee, children’s books including Grumble D. Grumble Learns to Smile, All the Scary Things, and See How Strong You Are. Benston lives in Springfield, Ohio with her awesome daughter, Mya and enjoys traveling, reading, writing, and telling it like it is. She enjoys being able to help other authors get their stories out there through Higher Ground and has recently expanded her freelance services to offer more extensive guidance as a writing coach and social media manager. For more information, you can contact Benston at highergroundbooksandmedia@gmail.com.

Some end-of-year fun…

Well, another year has passed and circumstances have prevented me from finishing the next book in the Rona Shively Stories series. Fear not, it’s on the way. I just had a few minor personal catastrophes to deal with first. In the meantimes, I wanted to share something fun here. I know many people say that you shouldn’t do these things because hackers will get your personal information, but I assure you that there is no classified information contained in my answers. So, take a look at this comparison between my 47 year-old self and my 50 year-old self. Feel free to do your own A-Z assessment. 🙂

THE ABC’S OF ME! 🖤

My answers at 47My answers at 50
Age – 47
Bed size – Full
Cat’s name – No cat
Dog’s name – No dog
Essential start of your day – some sort of coffee…
Favorite color – PurpleHeight – 5′ 1”
Instruments you played – None
Job title – Publisher
Kids – One wonderful daughter
Last ate – Grilled cheese
Mom’s name – Brenda
Nickname – Beaker
Overnight hospital stays – Maybe four or five…
Pet peeves – People who don’t take time to think about what someone else may be going through.
Quote from a movie – “I wouldn’t say I’ve been missing it, Bob,” Office Space or “Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit smoking,” Airplane or anything similar to these.
Right or Left handed – Right
Siblings – Two sisters
TV – The Good Doctor, Grey’s, The Masked Singer, New Amsterdam
Underwear – Absolutely!
Vacation favorite – Grand Canyon/Las Vegas
Ways to relax – Writing
X-rays – A whole bunch of them…
Yummy food – Pizza, lasagna, eggplant parmesan
Zoo favorites – Lions, tigers, and…I don’t know…bears.













Age – 50
Bed size – Same bed
Cat’s name – Still no cat
Dog’s name – Still no dog
Essential start of your day – Coffee, just coffee
Favorite color – Purple
Height – 5′ 1”, but possibly shrinking.
Instruments you played – Still haven’t picked that up.
Job title – Publisher/Salary Administrator by day
Kids – One wonderful daughter
Last ate – Oatmeal
Mom’s name – Brenda
Nickname – Beaker
Overnight hospital stays – Maybe four or five…thankfully no more since then.
Pet peeves – I still don’t care for people who don’t take time to think about what someone else may be going through. However, I’m more annoyed by people who choose not to pay attention to the truth. People who bury their head in the sand and just let bad things happen rather than taking action to stop it.
Quote from a movie – “I wouldn’t say I’ve been missing it, Bob,” Office Space or “Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit smoking,” Airplane, “You know I don’t speak Spanish,” Ron Burgundy,  or anything similar to these.
Right or Left handed – Right
Siblings – Two sisters
TV – Various anime series and the occasional K-drama.  Fruits Basket, To Your Eternity, Death Note, All of Us Are Dead, Little Women, The Sound of Magic, etc. 
Underwear – Again, absolutely!
Vacation favorite – I do love the Grand Canyon/Las Vegas, but any vacation would be great at this point.
Ways to relax – What is that? Relaxing?
X-rays – None for a while now.
Yummy food – Pizza, lasagna, eggplant parmesan – though nothing is really tasting all that great these days.
Zoo favorites – Lions, tigers, and…I don’t know…bears. Why would I change this answer? It’s my favorite.

While you wait for the next Rona Shively Story, check out this new short fiction on Kindle Vella! I release it chapter by chapter, so there’s always something new to read! Remember to like and follow each story for regular updates!

End of Eternity – https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B09YSXN5CQ

Redemption – https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B09K53DYFT

A Great Work of Fiction – https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B092MH3W5G

2013: The Resolutions

Being over forty, I wasn’t going to spend time making a list of things I planned to do this year.  The idea of forming “resolutions” seemed so childish and outdated that it didn’t seem to be worth doing.  After all, I’m not sure I’ve ever really stuck to any of the ones I’ve made in the past so why bother?  Funny thing, I woke up in the middle of the night with several things on my mind.  Not an unusual occurrence, but one that brought about new deliberation on the whole concept of making resolutions.  It isn’t that the process of making resolutions is childish and outdated, the problem has been that the resolutions I was making were childish and outdated.  So, instead of creating this self-limiting, self-defeating set of rules for myself, I’ve come up with some realistic and useful goals for this new year.  Here they are:

First, I resolve to have more resolve.  This has been somewhat elusive over the years and in order to make any significant change in my life, I need to be able to stick to my guns, to stand “resolute” in my convictions and to push forward through opposition.  So,  while slightly redundant, this seemed an appropriate goal to have.

Second, I resolve to not recycle old boyfriends.  A slightly immature goal but an area that has been a huge stronghold for me and has created problems which have held me back from being able to make good progress on other goals.  I have had a tendency to be very forgiving in situations where that level of forgiveness isn’t necessarily warranted.  This year and every year forward, I resolve to leave the past in the past and to not waste energy attempting to draw water from a dry well.  If he’d been worth the effort at all, he would have been worth it back then.  Not that I discount anyone’s ability to change, but since I’ve changed pretty significantly over the years, it is more likely that the type of guy I once sought out is no longer the right type for me.  And in truth, probably never was.

Third, I resolve to follow the news more closely this year…no matter how intensely painful it may be.  In the past, I’ve tried to avoid watching news broadcasts because they seem to be so focused on drawing out the absolute worst in people and sensationalizing it.  However, I found it necessary this past year, with all that transpired in politics and government, to pay closer attention to what was going on and to spend some time in debate with others about the issues.  For a time, when I was in a season of deep personal crisis, I simply couldn’t handle adding any more negativity to my consciousness.  But I believe that I am now better able to manage the information and I kind of enjoy a healthy debate every once in a while.  So, we’ll see what happens.

Fourth, I resolve to study God’s word in more depth.  Instead of just reading the Bible each day, I am going to study a bit more intensely so that I can get to the heart of what Scripture has been trying to say to me.  Through working on my degree last year, I developed a real interest in how the Bible was put together and the history behind the Scriptures.  I want to know more about these things so that the message becomes even more deeply rooted in my heart.  Possibly, the best thing I can do for myself this year and going forward.

Fifth, although I try to do this anyway, I resolve to meet all of my challenges head on.  I try not to back down when confronted, but there have been some times when I let myself believe that I just didn’t have enough energy to deal with things.  Enough of that.  I will not be overcome by the challenges I face.  I won’t be afraid to admit when I can’t fight the fight alone.  This is the first step in getting to victory.

And finally, I resolve to focus on the three “G’s” in my life; my God, my gifts, and my girls.  As you may have guessed, God is at the center of everything I do.  I will continue to honor Him and the blessings He has given me (family, friends, health, etc.).  Though it pretty much falls under the same umbrella, I will also focus on the gifts He has given me.  I believe that God has given me the ability to write and communicate with others and hopefully to encourage others.  I will do my best to use these gifts to do what He has put me on earth to do.  Finally, my girls.  They are the people in my life who have meant the most to me.  My daughter, my mother, and my sisters as well as the many women that I have been fortunate enough to meet and call friend whether through work, school or church.  Yes, there are a number of guys out there who mean a lot to me as well, but my heart is for the empowerment of women and it will be a major focus this year.

So there it is.  The blueprint for the next twelve months.  Hopefully, God will allow me to work on these things and to grow and prosper this year.  I’m looking forward to being more effective and making a difference this year.  Hope you have a wonderful year as well!

Until next time…

Another Trip Around the…Sun?

Take a moment and watch this video, good song!

Trip Around the Sun

Well, let’s hope so.  I swear, looking back over the last twelve months of my life I would have thought there might be a few more victories there.  Sadly, I was doing pretty much the same thing this time last year as I am today.  On my 39th birthday, I was traveling to Cincinnati for a job interview which didn’t pan out and I was in relational negotiations with a loser.  That’s a nice way of saying that I was in mid-breakup with a guy I was trying to date.  It’s not like I didn’t accomplish anything, though.  At least this year, it was a different guy and I really did make some changes that I feel will turn out to be the right thing.  I just haven’t seen the fruits of those efforts yet.  It makes it difficult sometimes to keep planning ahead and to keep pushing toward new goals.  But in truth, I’ve been anticipating this day.  My fortieth birthday.  I’ve wanted so badly to be out of my thirties and now, I’m here.

Turning forty is a major milestone for me because it represents a fresh start after all of the upheavals and defeats suffered during my last decade.  My thirties represented the birth of my child whom I love more than life itself, the rise and subsequent fall of my marriage, the loss of some very important family members, the difference between admiration, infatuation, and true love, the realization that maybe I’m not cut out to do what counts as “real work” in this society, and an even bigger realization that I’m really not the one whose steering this ship.  I’m hopeful, that with God’s grace, I can move on to do something meaningful with the rest of my days on this earth.  And even though it often seems like nothing is happening, I know He is working in my life.  He’s certainly had me in a season on reflection and learning for the last ten years or so.   And I think I’m finally starting to form a clear picture of what He’s been trying to show me.

Looking back on the last twenty years, I can see where these times have helped me grow and where what I thought were the toughest trials I’d ever faced made me stronger.  God has a way of showing us who we are when we aren’t really paying attention.  All this time, I thought some of the things I were doing were just being done out of my inability to follow Him correctly.  As it turns out, it was part of His plan to help me overcome the most daunting strongholds that I still had in my life.  So, for my fortieth birthday, I’m giving myself the gift of giving up.  I’m giving up on things and people that are bad for me.  I’m giving up on relationships that hold no promise other than to hurt me and stall my progress.  I’m giving up what I believed to be control of my life to Someone who is better equipped than myself to guide me through this mess.  I’m giving up on trying to be what everyone else wants me to be.  And in doing so, I’ll be giving up on being frustrated and finally allowing myself to enjoy being the person God made me to be.  Yes, after forty years, I think it’s time I started being myself.  Maybe this trip around the sun will be more than just another trip around the same mountain.  I’ll get back to you on that…but in the meantime, have a wonderfully, blessed day!